An Ode to Sleep

Sleep.

Oh sleep.

How I miss thee.

It's been eight days of germs in our house, and as any parent knows, germs equal NO SLEEP. It's been two-and-a-half years since B was born, a new sleep low for me, and four-and-a-half years since N was born, my first dip into the world of sleep deprivation.

I really miss sleep.

Late at night, after providing my kiddos with water/kleenex/chapstick or whatever else they woke me up for, I reminice about the 'good ol' days'. Evenings spent snuggling in bed with my hubby, watching a movie or some ridiculously awful TV series and falling asleep in each other's arms. Sleeping until I woke up because my body was ready and not remembering a single moment of what happened between when my head hit the pillow and the next morning.

All you single, newly married and married-without-kids friends, I AM JEALOUS OF YOU. That's correct, I'll admit it. I would trade my first-born child (and perhaps my second-born to sweeten the deal) just to get a few nights of uninterrupted, solid sleep. Is this why sleepovers were created? Hmm...

I used to think I was losing it when thoughts of booking a hotel room just to sleep for 24 hours crossed my mind. Then a girlfriend with kids the same age as mine reported the same wish. WHEW! If I was losing it, I was going there with someone else, thank goodness. I wonder if the beds are comfy in crazy town?

To complicate things further, my very loving, totally amazing hubby snores. LOUDLY. This means that once I've returned to bed after visiting my not-really-sleeping angels I lay awake in frustration. Often times the poor guy gets a bolt from me, asking unrealistically, to stop the maddness. He'll roll over and, before I'm even settled, be right back to sleep... and snoring...

I'm now 21 weeks pregnant. In first pregnancy language, this is the 'feel well' trimester marked by increased energy and desire to prepare for baby. In second pregnancies this is the 'feel ok' stage where you know you should feel energized and still prepare accordingly for baby. In third pregnancies, well, I'm finding that this trimester is as exhausting as the first, without much time to prepare for baby much less rest up. Thank goodness I'm able to sleep late on weekends, something hubby insists on at every possible opportunity. I'd kiss him for this, if I had the energy.

Sleep is just NOT my friend. And with our third baby on the way, I can only imagine how much worse this is going to get. Hubby and I have decided to bunk the little one with his older brother, secretly hoping that N will lead by example and teach his little brother that sleeping straight through the night is the cool thing to do (when you are healthy). When the boys are sick, it's going to be a certified gong show. I'll be sending Daddy in to 'deal with his boys.' ha!

In the meantime, I just keep plugging away at my mama and work-at-home-mama duties, dark circles under my eyes, hoping to win the sleep lottery. Perhaps someday I'll find the time to relax in bed, not because I'm tired, but because there is simply nothing to do and no-one to care for. I imagine this is part of having a seniors' discount? Seems more attractive all the time...

Oh sleep.

How I miss thee.

The new 'normal'

This was a rough week in the Isaak house. Brooklyn got sick Tuesday morning, prompting me stay home from work and care for her, a task with it's perks (let's be honest, the cuddles rock) but inevitably... laundry! After spending most of the day cleaning, bathing, laundering and attempting to feed Miss Sickie, the rest of the family came home. On with dinner, dishes, more laundry, more bathing and ultimately, bedtime. While this isn't an unusual situation for me, I've been battling a back issue which has left me with horrible lower back pain.

When I finally had the chance to sit down, around 8:30pm, I said to my husband, "I just want things to get back to normal." He laughed. "Pam, this is our normal," he said, much to my shegrin. I stewed over that comment for a few minutes, but eventually lost myself in the laughter of terrible American Idol auditions and forgot all about it.

Until 3am. I woke up in intense pain - my back has been giving me major issues this week. As I laid in bed, waiting for the advil to take effect and with an ice pack wedged between my lower back and the mattress, it hit me. He was right (don't tell him I said that). THIS IS OUR NEW NORMAL.

When was the last time I slept the night? Like really closed my eyes at bedtime and never opened them again until the alarm clock went off. I CAN'T EVEN REMEMBER.

When was the last time I wasn't scrambling to take care of a sick child? We did have a quiet streak around the holidays (thank goodness). SOMEONE IS ALWAYS SICK IN MY HOUSE.

When was the last time I took care of myself first? Ha! This is humorous. Mama's never go first, it's silly to think any mother would ever put their needs in front of their children's. Not happening. NO WAY.

When was the last time I sat down and relaxed after work, or anytime before 8:30pm? Between meals, dishes, laundry, dogs and the like, the list of 'to-dos' is always longer than the time I have left each night after work.

It took my until now - 11:15am Saturday morning - to write this post. After spending the night cleaning up vomit and managing a high fever, I just tucked Nolan back into bed to (hopefully) sleep off some of these germs.

Huh. Four days late. MUST BE THE NEW NORMAL.