Birthdays in Heaven

I'm struggling to detail my thoughts, my heart full of feelings. I know that tomorrow is Miller's first birthday in heaven, and I wish it were here, with us. That little pooch, my first fur baby, he is still missed an incredible amount in our home. My heart still has an unoccupied, empty space which used to hold his physical presence. His skinny body. His furry ears. His relentless quest for snuggles.

Tomorrow is Miller's birthday. And his mommy can't be there to spoil him.

It's funny, how kids just know, just sense what adults need. Tonight, B asked me to read her 'Somewhere Over the Rainbow Bridge', the gorgeous book which describes a dog's journey to heaven along a connected rainbow beginning on earth. It was hard to read, but I found comfort in the following passage:

Just as they did in life,
dogs want to make their
loved ones happy, to tell them,
"Everything is all right.
It's beautiful over there.
And we are not done -
not by a long shot.
I'll always be here for you."

Happy Birthday my Miller boy, I hope Gram feeds you Pizza Hut crusts and Pop takes you fishing. Maybe Babcia will even slip a cheese slice into your dinner. You are well-cared for, no doubt, but please know you are so special that the kids, Daddy and I still talk about you every single week.

Love, Mommy

On his last day, so sick but still one of my favourite photos. I can see deep into his soul through those eyes.